Westwood Viliage, California.
Travel with my in-laws.
At least I've learned not to kill them. There was a time when it was touch and go.
Don't get me wrong. I love them and all. Mom-In-Law (MIL) is great. But Dad-In-Law (DIL) is truly not right in the head. Oh, he's a good man, kind enough, generous in his own way. A man who attained high rank in the coast guard, who was a widely respected nuclear propulsion engineer and is now a nationally respected tax expert. But he's still a basket case when he travels.
You can break travelers up into two types; those who have thier best brought out by travel, and those who have thier worse brought out. Oh, sure, like all such rules, this one's wrong. But not all the way wrong.
DIL is one of the worst-brought-out types.
Let's talk a little about panic. About predator/prey.
We don't all fall into these roles. Some people are not neatly slotted thus. But for those of us who have a predator instinct, prey behavior is a natural trigger. So I see panic, I respond to it the way a sleepy dog responds to a cat. The cat walks by, the dog won't really care. The cat acts scared and runs, the dogs thinks "gotta chase that" and goes after it. People panic and look scared around me, I respond with aggression.
DIL is comfortable enough in his own environment; he works at home and does not go out a lot. But he's got a lot of OCD and almost Asperger behaviors. He is obsessed with time and schedules and lives in fear of being late. He wants to get everywhere early, he wants to leave earlier than he needs to. He worries over anything that takes any time that he can't control. I think he really can't estimate time either.
I've done a lot of traveling. I know how to do this. My kids know how to do this. My oldest, at last count, was over 50 plane flights. At ten, she could travel alone and have no trouble. We're pros.
But DIL has this idea that 1) we're always late for everything and 2) no one but him is aware of this.
The worst is trying to catch trains or shuttles. I've seen him run out into a stream of traffic at an airport with a cart full of luggage to flag down the wrong limo. I've seen him almost gibbering over missing a rental-car shuttle. He barks and figits and hyperventilates. He screams at people and in general acts like a lunatic in these situations.
It hit it's worst a few years back in england. We had an altercation. I yelled at him and hurt his feelings. I was, I admit, mean. Since then it's been easier, and I've learned how to settle him down.
"I got it, the shuttle driver knows we're here."
"How?"
"I made eye contact with him."
"Oh. Really? And he knows now?"
"Yes".
"You're sure?"
"Yes, I'm really really sure".
And even then, he seemed surprised that the driver picked us up and that I managed to get all the luggage on.
The man's almost 90. And very spry and alert and with it for his age. But still, it's like traveling with an over-sized kid, and that's been true for 20 years.
The funny part is, traveling with MIL is easy. She's a pro, and knows how to do it. But when she's with her husband, she takes on his panic, and tries to help everyone, and makes it all worse. She likes to give driving directions from the back seat, which never, ever agree with the directions or the map we have, and usually don't match the problem we're having, and are often wrong. She lives to be helpful; she's a serving drone. As as a traveling companion she's aces, until you put her with her husband, at which point she gets to be just like him.
I pick on them. But I do love these people. They irritate me the way only close family ever can, but damn, I hope I manage as well at thier age. They're still hiking, swimming every day, gardening. They're slowing down but they're still in great shape. It's not at all impossible that they're outlive me giving my tendancey toward poor choices.
But every time I get to an airport with them, I swear, 'never again'. And I'll swear the same thing next time. And the time after.