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July 25, 2008
Link from a friend.
"we are never more beautiful than when we're most ugly, because that's when we really know....what we are really made of"
Don't mind the ads at the beginning. This is worth listening to.
Posted by daruma at 11:16 PM | Comments (0)
why deny the obvious?
Maybe, to really understand the words, there has to be something sacred to you. Something to which you are accountable. Or maybe you just need to be ready to really hear. I don't know.
Once upon a time, I was a good catholic boy and God was sacred to me. Forever ago in another world I still had the smell of incense in my nostrils. The faint chime of the eucharistic bell as the monstrance was raised still rang familiar to my ears when I was struggling with the seatbelt in the back of Saathi Rajan's car, waiting to pick up another member of our posse on a freezing cold Saturday night in January. It was so fucking cold, and Saathi's leather seats seemed smooth and rejecting as I huddled there and discussed music with this man who was far too familiar to me who I didn't want to trust.
And he really wanted to play for me this one song. He knew I'd "get it" straight away. To him, it was the greatest of songs. Paul Simon's new album had only just been released, back then, and he was excited about it and wanted me to hear it. I wish I could say I enjoyed the song at the time, but all I could think of was the cold and that I hated drums and the intro was thus way too long and annoying.
Ironically - when you hear it, you'll understand - I faked my enjoyment. We might even have been parked next to the basketball courts at Kits High School as well. It's impossible to be sure.
I'd only been in Canada for three months and I could lead a rosary but I didn't recognize symbols - maybe they were too close, then - and so the meaning of the words escaped me. My life was still compartments, and the real reason I distrusted Saathi (I understand now) was that he wanted to know too much about me too soon, and I wasn't ready for someone else to understand me better than I understood myself. I hadn't even noticed the comma in the title, thought the cross was some kind of baseball reference. All I knew was that the drums in the intro went on for way too long and were annoying.
There's something I'm trying to say, but I can't. I want to tell you why this song speaks to me in a way that it didn't when I was lying about my own reactions to a stranger and believed in the sacredness of things. I listen and I feel admonished and comforted at the same time and I want to make you understand and yet at the same time I don't.
Because there's really nothing to explain. It's obvious.
Posted by daruma at 1:07 PM | Comments (0)
July 1, 2008
Happy Canada Day.
If you ever get a chance, grab and read a paper by Charles Taylor entitled "Language and Human Nature". According to my photocopy it can be found in Human Agency and Language, Philosophical papers, Vol1: Cambridge University Press, 1985. That makes it sound old, But it reads like a detective thriller; This Taylor guy is all about pace, pace, pace, and he strings his ideas together gracefully and compellingly. It's a good read.
A very dear Friend of mine once gave me a copy of The Artist's Way. It suggests that anyone who wants to nurture their artistic side write something called "the morning pages", that is, three pages of text written pretty much as soon as you get up. For the third time since I got the book, tomorrow I'm going to try and follow that advice. I may let you know how it goes; this seems like the place to talk about process, even if I'm getting no results.
One other thing: This day is bittersweet to me. Although it could change in literally in the time it takes to make a penstroke, as I write I'm still not recognized here. People confuse facts with truth when often they are mere details; I love this land, I love the people in this land, I care about their future and I share their values as I understand them. And in that spirit I wish anyone reading this today that same love in their own lives and in the people and places they turn to to remind them who they are.
Happy Canada Day.
Posted by daruma at 1:47 AM | Comments (0)